Moving, Jobs, Cats and Pincurls

So I'm moving! That's right, Jessica and I have had enough of dealing with crankypants neighbor downstairs and will subsequently be moving not too far away from where we currently live to reside in an apartment that will hopefully allow us to function like the youthful women we are. We'll be a bit more into Silverlake, over in Sunset Junction so I'm forseeing a lot of movies at the Vista and visits to Intelligentsia coffee and total hipsterdom to follow. I'm excited about the new place...it's a 2 bedroom 1.5 bath (my room is the one with a toilet and sink). It's all wood paneling and ceramic floors, so no carpet, it has great light because of these three rather large windows in the livingroom/kitchen area. We get 2 parking spaces but there's no laundry room. It comes with a brand new fridge and stove and is currently being completely repainted for us. My room's window does face into another building but Im just going to overload the windowsill with plants and I think it will all end well. And cats are permissible with no added deposit or cost!

Which brings us to cat finding now of course! Im looking very hard now for a calico or tortoiseshell kitten that I can hopefully name Miss Hepburn (since me and Jess both love Katherine) and then we can also call the cat a hepcat!!! And what with all the swingdancing what could be better?

Oh yes jobs...have a job now for the in between time of DGA at American Apparel, over where Mollie works...should be good. Im also very excited because while meeting one of the cats I also met a DGA commercial AD who is going to be hiring me on as a PA! Its an amazing lucky contact and great money. Cant wait, I start with him on a project next week for a day.

And then there's pincurls...Dancing is going strong. As is vintage dress buying :) Oh yes and recently vintage furniture buying too. So I've started to learn how to pincurl my hair. Its a constant work in progress but Im loving it enough to say that I think Ill do it every night I wash my hair when Im off show. Here's how if you care to learn as well:

Tumblr

I'm trying out a Tumblr account and may in fact be making the blogging move yet again. For now Im giving it a shot but if I like it Words...maybe moving to the Tumblr site:

http://josephenecat.tumblr.com/

Love Came Home Late Last Night and Fell Asleep in Front of the Television

by S.A. Griffin

love wanders down

streets

sometimes crowded

sometimes empty

and dying

love staggers blind in a drunken rage

wages wars and

hunts for answers

afraid of being

left alone

it is penance for those that

cannot

live with themselves

only

it is a bad cookbook

and a nasty bout of the flu

that keeps coming back stronger each time

it enters the room and announces itself

calls itself

friend and lover

forgets to call or write after it is

gone

but never really forgotten

love is running for president

and starring in the new fall line up on

every bad comedy invention

it is a musical comedy nightmare on

4 weeks

2 legs

and one eye in the back of its head

winking in the rain

dancing to the frantic

rhythms of

I want you now

and

don't you know how I really feel

and why don't you love me?

love is homeless and

out of work

with too many children in need of a

place to stay

and no matter what the

question

love is still

the

only

answer

Waiting

The days are moving slowly but they are moving.

Still no work. So I fill my time with calling Central Casting and trying to get on jobs, with reading, knitting, eating and sleeping, cleaning, watching Big Love, and lots of hanging out with Mollie, Mitchell and Jess W.

Recently me and M and M went out to Barnsdall Park which is right down the street. We went in time for the sunset. Its a small little park with the Hollyhock House in it (Frank Lloyd Wright) we took photos and explored. I love my neighborhood!

So I've been missing my gardening very much and I was talking about it to M and M. So we all thought, why not chip in together to get a community garden plot? So we did our research and went checking those out too. Hopefully we can make it happen. It would be wonderful. Especially right now when I really have nothing to do.

Not everything is good though. More issues with the guy downstairs. Jess is seeing a guy who's in Australia so she talks to him at late hours. I let her know about the sound issues from before and here they are resurfaced. The guy downstairs can hear her talking...they had an argument last night. I didnt get any sleep. Im stressed because I really dont want to have to move out. Hopefully this can somehow be remedied but honestly there's not much I can do about it...I cant fix the problem, just like when I couldnt fix it with Tom.

Recovery

The teeth have for the most part returned to normal, at least the ones that had already come out of my gums. The one impacted tooth, the side that was all chipmunky, continues to hurt because the cut they had to do in order to get the tooth out has left the root to the tooth next to it exposed. So there's some pain there, particularlywhenever I work out actually... But Im hoping thatwith a week or two of healing everything will return to normal.

No calls from the DGA so Im still sittin at home doing a combination of the following things: knitting, watching Big Love (on season 2 currently), eating (there's a bit too much of that going on), playing the Sims, reading, working out and occasionally talking to Josh. On certain days I have fun outings with Jessica, like today when we went to swing dancing, came home made dinner and watched X files and other days, like yesterday, when me Mollie and Mitchell headed down first to Beverly Hills and then onward to Venice Beach. Venice beach was intense. It was Saturday so it was just a swarm of people riding bikes and walking dogs. Crazy but lots of fun.

Swing dancing is a blast. I absolutely love Sunday and Mondays now and I have to say Im completely enamored with Lindy Hop. Absolutely love it! I love when you get a partner that really knows what they're doing and actually leads. Theres nothing like feeling that "just right" amount of pressure that tells you exactly what you should be doing. Im all smiles when I go. I really do think that my heaven is some combination of a dance floor, my bed and lots of food.

And while Im sure all of this sounds fun to everyone I am currently making ZERO money. Which is bad, very, very bad. I'm ready to move on and get to that next show. So from now on most of my posts are probably going to be some form of me begging and pleading for the DGA to call me with my next assignment.

4:30am

So having these wisdom teeth removed has wreaked havoc on my immune system and 3 days later I came down with some sort of illness. I find it funny that when I worked all 64 days on Sunshine I didnt get sick, not even when people around me were walking around with a walking pneumonia but, the second I stop working I instantly get slammed with illness. I guess its to make up for all that time of being well... This is the 3rd cold/flu since the show ended.

So I woke up at around 430A in a cold sweat. My pajamas were just drenched and so were my sheets for the most part. I was so hot I apparently ended up sweating like crazy and then woke up freezing because of that. Moreover the illness and the wisdom teeth have been a ridiculous double whammy where the pressure from my sinus is creating some mad crazy pain on the chipmunky side of my face.

Ive had to not only wake up, strip my bed and put on new sheets and all new pajamas but then when I tried to get warm I found it impossible so I just went and took a 15 min hot shower. Now Im back in bed, finally warm, but the pressure on my face is driving me insane, that and I cant breathe very well. I HATE being sick.

All this says to me is that this is just ANOTHER reason for me to go back to work.

Chipmunk

Its over! Wisdom teeth are all gone now.

I dont remember a thing from the procedure which is wonderful and also, even though I only paid for them to remove two teeth, they did all three because the dentist assumed that I must be having them all removed! So hurray for, sorta stealing? Hey...after the fact I wasnt gonna say nuthin about it.

The experience was definitely terrifying. Once I got to my chair and the overwhelming noises of drilling (the UCLA dental school just has a big room where everyone has a cubicle for their patient so no separate rooms) and then seeing all the crazy shit they were going to be using on my mouth on a tray sorta overwhelmed me.

I sat down in the chair and they tried to put in the IV at my elbow crease and for some reason failed. Apparently, I have a shady vein there that appeared to be a good one but in fact was not. So then instead they painfully put the damn thing at my wrist. At this point another woman was putting all the heart monitors on me and that tubey thing that goes in your nose. This is where the panic set in and I started crying. Not like crazy sobbing but I was definitely freaking out a little bit.

The dentist told me I needed to calm down before he could give me the meds so I told myself I needed to relax. He asked me if I was allergic to anything at that point too because apparently I was getting all red and splotchy with hives. I told him that Ive never been allergic to anything before and that I was just freaking out because I hate dentists since they worked on many of my teeth without anesthetic in communist Poland.

I relaxed, they gave me the meds and I have no freakin clue what went on after that. It felt incredibly fast. I remember at some point he did show me one of my teeth that was apparently strange and hook-like and was therefore difficult to get out. Im assuming this was the one on the right, the one they had to cut in to get because thats the side of my face that is swollen to all hell and theres this sore spot on the outside like someone was gripping my face really hard.

And that was it! I "woke" (I dont ever remember going to sleep) with wads of gauze in my mouth and the dentist giving me a perscription. It was really difficult to swallow. I walked out of there slightly woozy but not enough to even have a drunk walk. Then it was off to the pharmacy.

By the time me and Juliana made it across town through traffic the anesthetic had worn off and I was starting to writhe a bit from the pain while we waited for my vicodin. I got an ice pack, the meds and headed home.

I scarfed down yogurt, took my vicodin, and waited. It was awful. I started crying cause everything hurt and I just felt miserable. After an hour of not feeling any different I took another half of a vicodin and after about 10 more min Ashley M. said that it was ok to take 2 of them so I took the other half. About 10 minutes after that I finally started feeling relief.

Since then its been ok. The pain was minimal this morning. Though the bleeding on one side is pretty bad. I only have chipmunk face on that side :)

So happy that its over.

SWING SCHEDULE!

Hells yeah! I drafted my swing schedule! I wasn't joking about all this dance business peeps! I went scouring the internets and found 2 dance studios that work with my stupid stupid DGA schedule or lack there of and 1 probable. Even if the 1 probable doesn't work out Im not too disappointed since the others are a total go!

Pasadena Ballroom Dance

They happen to be the place where all the swinging cats in LA hang out. Over the course of my research I found that much goes on in the way of swing dancing in Pasadena so... it's wonderful that their schedule meshes with mine because not only will I be getting to know the people on the scene I'm sure this will also help find out where else to go to get more out of swingin' in LA.

Sunday 4:15-515 Jitterbug and East Coast Swing!

The best freakin kind of swing there is! Fast and loose! So I have to drive 30 minutes to get there....thats the sacrifice of the schedule...This is the one class that I know 100% I can make EVERYTIME no matter what. So Im paying for the 6 week course this Sunday (hopefully the wisdom teeth will have cleared up by then).

Now here are the Saturday times that get a little wonky because of DGA Trainee Seminars

Saturday 10-11A Pasadena offers a Lindy Hop Course!

Waking up that early on Saturdays when Im not working--piece of cake- I'll be going this weekend (again pending the okay-ness of the teeth). But getting up that early after working a 70 to 80 hr work week? Not so much...

Oh, and if I dont want to drive out the 30 minutes so early I can do the Lindy course on Monday nights (this is of course the Im not working option). And again if Im not working I can go on Wednesday to mess around with some West Coast swing as well! Pasadena Ballroom you're a gold mine!

West Adams Studios- Right down the street from me!!!

Swing Level 1 Drop in classes for 10$ each on Saturdays 12-1

I'll be able to make these every other Saturday because of trainee seminars but you bet your freakin ass Im going! Its so close to me and totally affordable.

And there's the Culver City place that offers Swing on Saturdays from 3-4 but the classes are consecutive and may be difficult to work around since I wont be able to attend every week because of the seminars. The consecutive is what kills it...

But Im so excited! I will be swing dancing once again...oo I cant wait!

For Relaxing Times...

I love waking up whenever the fuck I want. Its like a magical fairy has visited me. I wake up, under piles of blankets of course, with Alfred (my space heater) lovingly warming me and I lay there savoring the fact that not only do I A)not have to be anywhere but also B) I can do whatever the hell I want.

The majority of today was spent futilely running around town after books and things. After drafting my 50 list I really had the urge to find used bookstores around town. Sadly, I forgot that its freakin New Year and so many places were closed. I don't really NEED to go running around town looking for places considering the fact that an amazing freakin used bookstore is walking distance from me on Franklin (Im referring to Counterpoint) but since they were closed I went in search of others in Glendale. Brand Books was also closed but looked AMAZING and I fully intend to return and then across the street was a place called Mystery and Imagination Bookshop, which with such an amazing name, was not AS cool as I would have liked. I had a hard time finding the things I wanted... their "sectioning" was kind of confusing.

Needless to say I went there, then visited the Glendale Goodwill where I found quite a decent copy of Middlesex for 2 bucks and then went to the Glendale Galleria to swap out these tights for earrings at their Claires. While there I also retardedly bought 16$ worth of Godiva. OK sue me I'm weak for chocolate....I regretted it later...

Oh! A couple days ago I went to the Out of the Closet near me and found some amazing stuff! I've been wanting wine glasses and you could not believe my luck! I found these:

I'm fairly certain that they're at least from the 50's...They were all grimey and gross, but I saw through it :) And after a good washing they came out beyond beautiful! They have this incredible gold leaf edging that's roses. SO happy. Total cost? 9$.

Also found this incredible old reference book published in 1950 titled "Year: Mid Century Edition." It covers the mid-century in photographs and short blurbs and is so amazing! Fantastic coffee table book if anything. Granted, I'm reading the thing and I think I'll get a lot out of it. It's a different way of learning history; shows a lot of what people thought of the events then rather than now with all the years of distance. Also lots of random little tidbits that don't really make it into our history books. You know, stuff that was considered important then that didnt really carry over til now.

What else?

Mollie's on her way to LA! Cant wait til she gets here (Thursday).

Jessica (my new roommate) gets here on Wednesday! Also can't wait for that.

Getting my wisdom teeth removed on Tuesday...eish...terrified.

Loving my iphone! It really is life changing.

Waiting for a call from Janet...come on DGA place me place me!

Thats the news peeps. Thats the news.

50 Book Challenge

There's no better way to start the year than with challenging yourself. So call it a New Years resolution of sorts.

This idea was stolen from Ashley M. and her blog and slightly adapted for my own purposes.

THE CHALLENGE

I have drafted a list of 50 books I know that I would like to read. Of these 50 books I will read at least 30 in the next coming year. That's it, that's the challenge. I'm sure I'll discuss each book as I finish it here so you can keep up with my progress if you like. And now for the list:

1 Beatrice and Virgil - Yann Martel

2 Moby Dick - Herman Melville

3 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley

4 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoevsky

5 The Fountainhead - Ayn Rand

6 Let The Right One In - John Ajvide Lindqvist

7 The Sun Also Rises - Ernest Hemingway

8 Sophie's Choice - William Styron

9 The Satanic Verses - Salman Rushdie

10 The Magus - John Fowles

11 God is Not Great - Christopher Hitchens

12 Middlesex - Jeffrey Eugenides

13 The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo - Stieg Larsson

14 The Girl Who Played With Fire - Stieg Larsson

15 The Girl Who Kicked the Hornets Nest - Stieg Larsson

16 The Hunger Games - Suzanne Collins

17 Catching Fire - Suzanne Collins

18 Mockingjay - Suzanne Collins

19 Hero - Robin Mckinley

20 Bonk - Mary Roach

21 Eating Animals - Jonathan Safran Foer

22 Manifesta - Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards

23 Second Nature: A Gardeners Education - Michael Pollan

24. The Strain - Guillermo Del Toro

25 Eat Pray Love - Elizabeth Gilbert

26 The Enormous Room - e. e. cummings

27. Sylvia Plath: Method and Madness - Edward Butscher

28 The Ethics of Ambiguity - Simone De Beauvoir

29 The World Without Us - Alan Weisman

30. Under the Banner of Heaven - Jon Krakauer

31. Through A Glass Darkly - Karleen Koen

32. Steppenwolf - Hermann Hesse

33. The Piano Teacher - Janice Y. K. Lee

34. The Gendered Society - Michael Kimmel

35. The Second Sex - Simone De Beauvoir

35. The Feminine Mystique - Betty Friedan

36 The Purity Myth - Jessica Valenti

37. What to Eat - Marion Nestle

44. The Hangmans Daughter - Oliver Pötzsch and Lee Chadeayne

45. The Beauty Myth - Naomi Wolf

38. Orlando - Virginia Wolf

39. Mrs. Dalloway - Virginia Wolf

40. A Room of Ones Own - Virginia Wolf

41. Survival of the Prettiest - Nancy L. Etcoff

42. The Passion - Jeanette Winterson

43. Middlemarch - George Eliot

44. The Shining - Stephen King

45 The Thirteenth Tale - Diane Setterfield

46 The Drowned Life - Jeffrey Ford

47. A Murderous Procession - Ariana Franklin

48. The World According to Monsanto - Marie-Monique Robin

49. Beautiful Creatures - Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl

50. Spook - Mary Roach

Christmas Break

Well its over! My first show.

64 day benchmark in the DGA Training Program.

Thats an awesomely hefty amount of days on one show. And what a good show to be on it was :)

Now its time for a break. Time to relax, to work out, to have fun, to get and give presents and then come back and start fresh!

I'm excited about the gifts I have to give. Im excited about my time in Sarasota with my parents who I havent seen in so long. I think all in all the break will be great because Im saying that it will be.

When I return I want to focus more keenly on the program. I really need to start learning the rules and knowing all the little details. I need to do more of my observation days. If I have breaks I plan on reading, dancing, working out.

Its all going to be new and different when I come back. My new roommate (who consequently has already started moving in and is making me overly happy with her presence), Mollie moving walking distance from my house, and a new show to be on are all going to really create a different experience of Los Angeles. I can't wait.

The Cultured Life

Its about damn time that I returned to the cultured life :)

This past weekend I went to the Pantages for West Side Story. It was great! I love the fact that I can ride the subway one stop, pay 25$ for rush tickets and enjoy some broadway. The show was good overall. The male lead perhaps a little weak and the ending a bit of a disappointment but other than that I had a GREAT time. Me and Josh and Ellen had dinner beforehand and ice cream afterwards and I think I couldn't have asked for a better way to spend a Saturday afternoon.

I didn't stop there though because the next time I HAD to go see Black Swan and oh my god was it great! I love, love, loved it. Im debating on going again... It was beautiful and well acted, the story was great and Aronofsky only lost me once (lost me as in I felt he went a bit over the top, which is really saying something considering his movies). I have to say that mentally I felt a kinship to the movie given my recent dilemmas. The torn and crazy feelings are certainly familiar to me of late. Hurray Natalie Portman! You were superb.

And on that same note I suppose today I was inspired and decided to see what would be playing while I was in Sarasota. I found out that the Moscow Ballet would be in town on the 26 doing one performance of the Nutcracker. I asked my parents if they would like to go and they actually said YES! This ladies and gents is HUGE. My parents never go anywhere and for my, action movie watching father, to actually WANT to go to a ballet is pretty unusual. So yay for that!

Got this week and next week left on Mr. Sunshine which, BTW has an airdate now! Feb 9th on ABC Wednesdays right after Modern Family! Its a great time slot so hopefully the show will become popular and get picked up for a second season. I cant believe though that my time here is going to come to an end. It really was a great first experience.

Swing Dance

So ever since high school when ballroom became a fond memory for me Ive been missing dancing like no one's business, especially swing. There's just never been time or money for it. In undergrad I never felt like there was any extra cash, or I was with a boyfriend I, myself, didn't feel comfortable going off and dancing with someone else in a partner capacity. In grad school there was just no money and then in film school no time whatsoever.

I think its high time to stop thinking about it and start really, seriously, making an effort into me returning to swing dancing. I realize that while right now I may not have a lot of time (and I DO have seriously exhausted feet from work) Im going to try to make a real solid push to dance.

Swing is tough because its not as popular as salsa or ballet and you can't get to a place that just offers random time classes (especially in my case on the weekends) and since I cant very well sign up for a monthly class that happens every, say, Tuesday since I work like a madwoman I need to check the schedules for free classes and dances in the meantime and once Christmas break hits and Im back from visiting Sarasota try to get in as much as I can. I know its 15 or more a lesson but you know what, fuck it. Once I feel comfortable again to do it I can go to the Sat. Sun dances. So thats the plan right now. To make a real, wholehearted push to go to just about every class I can make during whatever time Ive got off after Christmas and before I'm onto the next show.

Lets see if how well I keep up.

Thanksgiving and various other things

Well I made it through that holiday. Id say sortof unscathed.

Thanksgiving went well. The plan for BIG event went off without a hitch. People came, brought LOTS of food, hung out and had a great time. 19 people in total at the end of the night.

It was great to see everyone. The next day me and K. went on a hike up in Griffith Park over by the abandoned zoo and did some geocaching. Then he was out of town once again. We had a break up talk and he left with things mostly unresolved so no real change in that department of life.

Im back on set and things are moving along fairly well. Only this week and then 2 more left on Mr. Sunshine and boy have I learned A LOT. I think over the Christmas holiday I really need to take the time to sort of reanalyze the things that are important to me. Or maybe Ive been thinking too much about that??

Trying to make a conscious effort to include more of the swing dancing in life. Ive got up on this website that tells me when all the swing nights in LA are so lets hope that I can start making it to some of those. As well as lessons...

Salmans is on her way here today! Later on this week some hanging out with her and a photo shoot which I cant wait for.

Lots of cool developments in the future:

Mollie is still on her way over in January which I think is going to blow my mind when she actually gets here. And theres also Wycoff arriving and moving in in January as well. New roomate, new friends in town, new show and what with knowing more about the job Im doing.

Oh and also coming this week is the new shirt I ordered from Threadless!

House Brawl

Life You Kill Me...Can I turn down the difficulty level?

Ridiculous.

Seriously. Ridiculous. I don't think a more back and forth, uncertain person can exist than me.

Has anyone ever thought about something so much that they have no idea what they actually think about the subject anymore by the time they realize how long they've been thinking about it? Or feel? Maybe I should use the word FEEL here.

What does it mean when you're confused about love? Confused about how you feel about someone? Am I comfortable or am I in love? Am I both? How do you KNOW deep down in your gut know if this is the person for you. I think its fair to say that there's some choice in the matter certainly but I also think there is some lack of choice too; afterall why do we like the people we like?

I'm in a ridiculous situation. I've been with someone for 7 years...I thought he was the man for me, perhaps I still do think this. We moved in together, I was sad, panicked, totally freaked out. Perhaps it was the circumstances? Or maybe it was just him? Now we're far apart. Very far apart. Do we keep going? A part of me feel this person is a part of me. More a part of me than my parents in some ways. But what now? 3 or 2 years of more long distance? Seeing each other for 3 or 4 days every month or 2? Is that a way to spend the rest of your 20s?

Open relationship perhaps?? But then how the fuck does that work?? Give up on it completely? But then when I try to do that my heart cries out and freaks out in such a way that I start to doubt that its JUST comfort and that there really is something to this person.

I don't know. How do you find clarity on a subject like this?

Hope that it all sorts ITSELF out in the end? I'd love to do that except for the fact that the firmest belief I hold is that one creates their own existence and life experience so by doing nothing I am in fact doing something therefore, an active choice is very important. Which way do I decide and how do I determine how to even make the decision.

So again I say...Life? Can we please PLEASE turn the difficulty level down just a tad??

Shopping Extravaganza

For me anytime I spend something over 100 dollars its considered a shopping bonanza so this weekend I decided that there were some things that I just needed.

For starters I needed a vacuum cleaner so there went about 50 bucks on the cheapest Dirt Devil I could find. It seems to be working well enough so Im satisfied with it.

And then there were speakers for my computer (I bought Sony ones for

30 bucks but I dont actually like them so they're probably going to go back). I plan on checkin out the Sony store on the lot and seeing what I can get there.

There there were some shirts. I bought 4 long sleeved shirts for work cause Ive been rotating through my 5 shirts way too much to the point where you can see I only own those couple shirts. But hurray for Buffalo exchange cause 30 dollars later I love my shirts! I also LOVE shopping there. I know its a hunt and sometimes something not fitting you right is dissapointing because you just CANT get it in the right size. But when you find some

thing great boy does it feel good.

Then there are my new monkey slippers:

And last but not least Im incredibly excited about FINALLY getting myself Pandemic as well as Beyond Balderdash. Saturday will be boardgame awesomeness!!! I can not WAIT!

PS. Sims is amazing. I love the Ambitions expansion and all I want to do is play more and more! Good news is that after this week I have a 10 day Thanksgiving break and can Sim it up for awhile :)

On Fall and Changes

More than likely my favorite time of the year fall is now being experienced in Los Angeles and its bringing with it highs of enjoyment and of course some disappointments. For starters, I sorely miss the rain of course. There's nothing like Florida downpours and that fresh and moist smell in the air. NEVER thought Id miss Florida but it seems that rain-forest climate is now in my bones.

The weather here has been up down up down; today its unbelievably hot. Nights are unbelievabl

y cold for me; at times I sleep under a down

comforter with another comforter on top of that and two long sleeved pajama shirts. I've actually had the cold wake me up in the mornings. The heat was turned on too, I don't know if its how old the building is or if

something is broken because I've never had to deal with a gas heater before.

Fall brings me Halloween, the ultimate of holidays! And even

though I didn't carve a pumpkin this year the costuming went over really well. I didn't even really DO too much because I was exhausted from work. I did wear my fairy outfit to work on Friday, where it was a big hit and then later out to Hollywood and Highland to walk the Walk of Fame and see everyone else's outfits. Strangers took photos with me, I took photos of strangers and all around fun was had.

Thanksgiving plans are abound. I've decided to host a Film School Family dinner at my place complete with long tables and lots chairs and hopefully many attendees and lots of food.

Caroline has volunteered to be the turkey master so I am thankful that day for being alleviated of that chore.

My computer came! It's sitting in a large box in front of the doorway in the living room and tempting me. Its making me crave the weekend. Well, that and whats been a pretty difficult week so far. I feel pretty tired. (De

finitely going in for a massage on Sat and Sun.) But yay computer...sadly amazon shipped Sims Ambitions to...Tallahassee so I may not be seeing that for a little bit(booooo).

And last but not least...Tom is moving out in December and Laura is moving in. It's an unfortunate series of events and a decision made by me to not continue fighting with my landlord. I cant afford to be mentally and monetarily moving at the moment and given that atmosphere surrounding the whole situation I was just tired of phone calls and complaints. I hope that our friendship will remain despite the fact that I know he feels at least somewhat if not totally betrayed. I did not ask him to go, the landlord did, even though I think he doesnt see it that way. But you never know...perhaps even good things will come of this? Maybe he will be happier in his living situation that follows, maybe me and Laura will become good friends?

Its a Man's World

Oh yes...here's a good one:

Joking around about one of the men (wont mention who) going into the production meeting to this song thats like the entrance to boxing match. This little fantasy scenario continues and the two guys in this convo are like oh yeah and so and so can be rubbing my shoulders as I walk in...wearing a robe and some shorts...

And I say, yeah you need some of those Round 1, Round 2 girls too.

And then he says to me:

"Honey, nobody wants to see you in a bathing suit."

ZING!

Makes me feel really good about all that workin out I do :)

I'm an Idiot, My Boss Hates Me, My Heart Hurts

This job will kill me. Maybe not this particular one but this career will. My heart goes into overdrive and I feel like a 27 year old person should not be experiencing chest pain. I get too stressed out, I TRY to live up to the expectations of one of my bosses and simply CAN NOT meet them no matter how hard I try. I forget things off the PR, or I miss hear or she just doesnt like the sound of my voice. When I try to sound nice and kowtow I think she thinks I'm being fake, when Im NORMAL Im not nice enough and come off as someone who doesn't want to learn. I can't do right by her at all.

I feel sad... Im just fucking sad. For whatever you see written in here most of the time Im sad. From both work and personal matters. Im trying to stay afloat on miniscule happy thoughts of Christmas and the Sims. My parents have essentially lost their job and are talking to me about moving back to Poland and... while they always do that this time it feels a lot more serious. I don't think I should stay with K. Someone spoke to me about how if we were meant to be together one of us would be willing to sacrifice in order for us to be in the same city and neither of us is willing to do that. I can't get over the fact that I lived with him and regardless of the circumstances I didn't have a good time and I don't know if I ever will and the opportunity to live together will not come up again in forever and can I really stay with him for that much longer? I can't find alternatives or moderate solutions; I just don't know how to be in an "open" relationship and be seeing other people. Its seems shitty and false and if Im going to do that I may as well just break up. I think Im a one or the other kind of person. This with the work and the parents and the loneliness of LA...

FUCK life. Just fuck it. The best part of my day is when I'm asleep. That's fucking sad.

New Computer

I did it. I finally sucked it up and spent the money on a new PC. I've been missing The Sims a lot. Enough to purchase a PC so that I can play it once again. So my new computer will hopefully arrive at my house by this weekend...

I know. It looks pretty BAMF. Its cause its from CyberPower...so basically I customed it so that it would run the game at its peak performance. It'll also function as my backup hardrive for all my music and photos from the Mac. The comp is on a 6 months no interest plan so i

ts not like Im dropping all the cash on it this very instant. Now I just need a name for it....

I also went ahead and purchased the expansion for the Sims that I was most excited about: Sims Ambitions. I bought that with my gift card to Amazon so it wasnt like I dropped extra cash on that.

So yeah...Sims...love of my life is back to get me through the hard times :)

Also did work on the Halloween costume this weekend that I WILL be wearing to work on Friday. Im sure I'll probably be mocked for it but who gives a shit you only live once. I'm going as a fairy. With a big neon blue wig of messy curls that has flowers and butterflies stuck in it, some awesome over the top eye makeup, a teal floaty dress and rather large teal and purple wings with blue rhinestones on them. Oh and purple tights. So the wings will get in the way of any sort of Halloween dancing at a club or anything like that...Ill look FAB! Pictures OF COURSE to follow.

Everyone is getting sick at work...Im bustin out the hand sanitizer and praying that the illness doesnt take me.